Talk
People don’t talk to each other, they merely speak at each other. I am not entirely sure if people have ever talked to each others, but I’ve recently noticed how difficult it was to have a meaningful conversation with anybody. Conversations all seem vacuous and express nothing but false pretenses. How can our society move forward at a time when all discussions turn to hysterical clashes where everybody tries to shoot the adversary down with shameless lies and ridiculous entitlements?
What makes our daily interactions so meaningless? Well, first people speak quickly without letting others speak in group conversations. It has become a race just to put even a word. Second once you have thrown your idea in the conversation and made sure of the effects it made on the audience. For example, let’s try not to be too reasonable and go for the radical position which did not matter to me at all before, but now that I’ve made that statement, I will have to endorse that to the end even it means fighting with reasonable people I agreed with before (I’ll never admit I was wrong or that I did say it in order to shock people). You are now satisfied with the effect your statement made on the audience, but now people answer to your words using their own opinions, instead of taking the time to inspect the other party’s proposal, you completely reject it and claim the other side is telling lies (you are the one actually). Now everyone is upset and this was never meant to be considering that all people taking part to the conversations were rational and educated people. When did it go wrong?
You have surely already experienced painful conversations like these ones with your friends, colleagues and family. This person might have been your conservative uncle, your socialist niece, your parents, etc. But this person must have been you in multiple instances. Most conversations take the wrong turn in my own experience. How about changing this situation and truly seek to connect with each other like we pretend we do? The media often relates the need for people and to connect (this need was curbed during the ongoing crisis), which is ironic considering the poor quality of the daily interactions most people have. Next time, I will slow down and first listen to the other party speak her mind before imposing myself. I will try to put myself in her shoes and try to understand her point of view. I might as well learn something new! Then I will bring my own perspective in the conversation. But, doing this after analyzing the other party’s point of view, my own perspective will be influenced and it will be different than my original perspective. that is the one necessary condition to follow meaningful conversations. When people connect, they grow together, they share intelligence. When people don’t listen to each other and only take the opportunity of the conversation solely to throw their messages, then the discussion brings about frustration from both parties.
Recently, I stumbled upon articles mentioning how loneliness might become one of the greatest concerns in modern societies, which might sound unexpected at an era when people have been the most able to communicate with each others at all times, even with people at the other side of the planet. This phenomenon might be partly explained by the vacuity of our daily interactions. Although we do chat with many (sometimes with people we don’t know from all over the world), we are unable to achieve truly genuine levels of conversations where one talks about intimate subjects that matter. In a society when one never really connects with anyone, it is no wonder that loneliness has grown rampant among younger generations.
The ability to conduct logical and faithful conversations lays also at the foundations of productive debates. These days, politics has seen the rise of low quality debates. The political circus has gradually reached the levels of the most disgraceful that the entertainment industry could not imagine years ago. Politicians have come to the conclusion that, in order to attract attention, you needed to raise your voice higher than your competitors, you needed to speak ill of your competitors even it meant personally attacking them, you could even lie to your electors.
Our society is treading on a gloomy path: global warming is inevitable, military conflicts loom between the greatest powers of our planet, populism is taking over the democratic world, etc. Salvation might definitely be found elsewhere than in the contemporary world, but rather in areas that no one but oneself can have an impact on. Despite our eyes wrongfully aimed at other objects of desire, let’s take this opportunity to invest this sphere which might as well be the only one that ever mattered all this time.